The Glaring Tiny SEO Mistake Cripppppling Bing and Yahoo

The internet is where you go to see stuff. The internet is huge business and there are three major league teams, Google, Yahoo and MSN. Google is like the old New York Yankee dynasty. Sergey Brin and Larry Page are like Mickey Mantle and Roger Maris. Yahoo and MSN are like the Cleveland Indians. The good news is that the internet owners are unbelievably charitable philanthropists. Bill Gates just bought food for Africa for the next century.

Yahoo and MSN have been extremely frustrated for years because they cannot understand why Google keeps beating their heads in. In the pop music video classic “Beat It”, a West Side Story spoof, which so far has had 42 million views on YouTube Michael Jackson sings, here, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uqxo1SKB0z8 “They told him don’t you ever come around here, don’t wanna see your face, you better disappear… Just beat it, beat it, no one wants to be defeated.”

In the words of Lynette Fromme, “The trick is to build a better mousetrap.” Yahoo and MSN considered promising virgins in heaven for users murdering people but that idea was already patented. Finally Yahoo and MSN decided to team up to beat the big bad bully Google. They spent billions of dollars doing SEO research and finally came up with Bing. The guys and girls at Google must be laughing their heads off.

Michael Jackson opined, “Sometimes the most obvious solution is right in front of your nose.” Bring up 3 web browsers and go to Google, Yahoo and Bing. Now type in the word “10ve”, ten followed by ve. 10ve. Happy belated VE Day.

Christopher Columbus bet his friends that he could get an egg to stand up. He then broke the bottom of the egg and stood it up. Once he did it it seeemed so simple, but prior to that his friend Michele da Cuneo was egg dreidelling for half an hour.

SEO, Search Engine Optimization, SEO is a billion dollar industry. You want to design your web page so that people will want to visit it. We used to visit our grandparents in the next tent but now we are Skype Sexting people half way around the world. My friend Lindsay broke her MacBook last night doing this. You don’t want to know how. Plus I promised not to tell anyone.

O.K. Where were we? Oh Right, the glaring SEO design mistake crippppling Yahoo and Bing. Now just bring up the 3 browser windows of google yahoo and bing and type in the word “10ve”. This mistake is so obvious that it’s embarrassing to even talk about it. Now scroll down to the bottom of the three pages.

Human beings are ruled by their emotions. We do what feels good and we don’t do what feels bad. We love looking at words on a computer screen because we are looking into the white light, the tunnel our spirits enter after leaving our bodies if we 10ve each other and ourselves. After we leave this plane, Muslims, Christians and Jews all go into the same white light that our ancestors went into for 5 million years before Judaism was invented 4,000 years ago by Abraham. You would think that someone so important would have a last name.

O.K. We searched the word “10ve” and now we are at the bottom of the pages of the top three search engines. Our brains have a center where when we see pretty images like Brad Pitt or Gisele Bundchen in bathing suits we feel pleasure. If we see and smell vomit we begin hurling profusely like chemotherapy patients with fourth stage cancer. This week scientists at the Broad Institute of Harvard and MIT discovered the cure for cancer in mice, salinomycin.

In order to go to the next page of search results for “10ve” in Google you take your index finger and roll the scroll mouse wheel straight down the center of the page where you see the numbers one to ten with underline links and a beautiful mind pleasing colorful rainbow image Goooooooooogle with 10 o’s. On the other hand, to go to the next page on Yahoo and Bing you have to give yourself a rotator cuff injury moving your mouse into the bottom left corner of the page where the numbers are in stupid boxes hiding like frightened little mice and no pleasing images. It’s now time to turn the page on all these wars. The answer to world peace is also simple: stop fighting.